taking one for the team

This weekend we (meaning 8 lovely ladies) celebrated the upcoming marriage of Ginny and Donald with a ritual commonly known as the Bachelorette party. We all drove to Asheville, NC where we stayed in this killer awesome hotel in downtown.

We were originally supposed to have 2 rooms that we were all going to pack into, but the hotel had a small mix-up and they put the 2 separate rooms on 2 separate floors, which was not what we planned. So, to make up for the mix-up, they upgraded us (fo free) to one of the top floor condos that is currently on the market for $1.3 million.

Have you seen the movie 'The Hangover'? This was something like that (minus the piano and the tiger). Here's the living room...


Later that night, we all went dancing and had an awesome time.

After dancing, we all were getting tired and we stopped at this one restaurant on the way home to sit down and put up our feet before we walked back to the hotel. We were all at one long table in the restaurant, and there was this table of 3 boys next to us. When they saw the table of girls, they came over and said hello. There happened to be an empty chair next to me, so one of the fellows sat there.

Within the first 5 minutes of sitting there, this fellow tells us that they are all out celebrating his upcoming move to Australia. He is moving there because he wants to steer away from the path that everyone (his family) expects him to follow, and he wants to clean up his debt by working in Australia, where apparently the minimum wage is $16.50. And he doesn't want to settle down to get married because he doesn't believe that you should get married before the age of 37 because that is such a deep commitment that he couldn't imagine having right now in his life. So, Australia it is!

At this point in the conversation, I decided that the opposite end of the table was the "winner" section, so I turned my attention to that side and let this strange boy tell his story to the unfortunate ladies who had no choice but to listen. bwahaha

After a little while of sitting, we decided to start heading out. I looked over and heard this same strange boy finishing up this story about how he lived in Hawaii for a couple of months and surfed with the locals. He was very proud of this.

I don't know how this was mentioned, but I had said something about Dog the Bounty Hunter because I know he is in Hawaii. He asked me if I like Dog, and I said "Well, I've only seen the show a couple of times, but from what I can tell, he's always nice to the people he arrests." ha

Minutes later, when we were all gathering our things to leave, this strange boy turns to me and says this (pay close attention):

"Well, I'm never going to see you again so I just wanted to give you a few words before you go. The locals in Hawaii hate Dog the Bounty Hunter. The land there is a big volcano and thanks to Oprah, a lot of people started buying up the land for housing and it is ruining the local vibe there, and the locals hate it. Dog the Bounty Hunter is a b*#&#rd. And in our lifetime, you will see the pandas go extinct. And you will see the whales go extinct. And I assume that you are a Republican. Well I just want you to know that it is your fault. You are a poor person."

No, I'm really not kidding.

This boy looked me dead in the eyes when he told me this. He was SO serious. And I don't even think he was drunk, which still would not be a good excuse for being a dummy.

I was so appalled at this guy that I could do nothing but giggle in disbelief. I knew that there was no reasoning with this boy. Within the first 5 minutes of sitting at our table, this boy tells us that he is financially immature, emotionally immature, and weird, and yet I am a poor person. And we never spoke about politics or anything that could have hinted about my political stance, so this must mean that my political stance is written on my forehead. No clue.

So, ladies and gentlemen, I have made a decision. I have thought about this boy's comment all weekend. I don't like being not liked, and I hate it when people judge you without knowing you. So his comment really did make me think. And I have decided to "man" up. I am going to take one for the team.

Years from now, when the pandas and the whales are extinct, I want everyone to know...that it is MY fault. No, not the Japanese whalers. Or whatever eats pandas. Nope. It's MY fault.

This is the burden that I must bear alone. And I think it is really important that if you know me and know anything about me, you should know this.

I hope that you all can find it in your hearts to forgive me for being responsible for the demise of the pandas and whales.

Thank you,
Awkward Samantha

PS - this place is going down.